confessions

akasha

- Yazar -

  1. toplam entry 394
  2. takipçi 1
  3. puan 12814

reconciliation

akasha
the perfect element i in çözümlendiği parçadır. melodisi morning on earth ile aynıdır, bir nevi daire çizilmiştir.

i thought i’d seen hell
thought i knew it all
now i know too well
hell is to wake up
but it makes all the difference

tasting the tears in my mouth
taking the weight on my shoulders
the hours and days of your life
don’t necessarily make you older

i’m sick of running away
along these bloody streets
i’m sick of predators and prey
of being everybody’s end!

i’ve washed my hands of your blood
thought it would leave me clean
but with time on my hands
it turned to mud forming this crust of sin

now - to be truly free
i’ll let it come to me
so -break me if you must
when you break this crust
freedom is to see

hear this voice, see this man
standing before you i’m just a child
just a man learning to yield

i hate these hands soaked in blood
i hate what these eyes have seen
up to my knees in filth and mud
how it hurts to become clean

i was always on my mind
but never on my side
run - but if you run away
you’ll always have to hide
so if you need to run
run for help!

king of loss

akasha
the perfect element i nin 7. parçası. sözleri dae pecuniae yi hatırlatıyor ister istemez.

mother, at my first breath
every paragraph was set
as i inhaled the scent of debt
mother, that first stolen air
on papers saying i’m not mine

"we crown you, the king of loss...
better get on your feet
best be one of us
better get yourself on the list
for success
dress up as a state investment
charm the press
a breed from the seed of only
one short breath"

mother, hence we cry:
some of us are free to stand
most of us are bound to lie
in those bloodstained beds
no one can afford to pay
the prices on their babies’ heads

i am the king of loss!
for every dear smile i feel i’m not one of us
"an ivory coin for every plus on your stone"

"one more governmental blade
now drawn from its sheath
quite a bargain i’d say since either way
you will live by the show of our teeth!"

mother, i wish that we could talk
you see
i’m not fit to play this game
bound by its rules just the same
my talents turned to talons
every monetary pile
will buy me a precious smile...
smile...

so smile for the king of loss
feed from the juices
bleeding from this cross
then tell me our lives mean more
than this vain thirst!

"a governmental blade
drawn from its private sheath
quite a bargain i’d say, since either way
you’ll be living by the show of our..."

i hold up my head
this was my life
now i’m with the dead
so i lay my bare neck
this is your call
dub a king or a wreck

(mother, listen to me mother)

this was my life
this is your call

is this all i am? is this all i’ll be?
this is not enough!

we’re all crying for respect and attention
we’re all dying for a painless redemption!
this is not what i wanted
but for every drop of blood i lost myself
i, too, lay bleeding on the sidewalk...

mother
long live the dying king

"a governmental blade
now drawn from its private sheath
quite a bargain i’d say, since either way
i will live by the show of your teeth..."

daniel gildenlöw be deki rolüne bürünmüştür çoktan.

dedication

akasha
pain of salvation ın the perfect element i adlı konsept albümünün 7. parçası

i watched you die
though you had always been there
since i first came into this world
outside people smile
i ask - why this deep blue sky?
when you have left this world today
does it not know when to weep?

all my life i’ve looked up to you
a humble old man who always knew
no one can ever be closer to god than you
so who could fill this void

i still can’t believe that you are not around
that your warm voice won’t make another sound
sure i understand, but i never will accept
that you should be gone

i watched you die
and i have feared this moment
since i was just a child
so why that sunny sky?
when my beloved grandfather
lies dead here cold and still?

idioglossia

akasha
pain of salvation ın the perfect element i albümünün 5. parçası.
çığlıkların hepsi daniel gildenlöw e aittir. canlı duymak henüz nasip olmamıştır. sözleri;

it all comes back to me

face to the floor
heart in my mouth
my forehead hits the pavement
again - numb - again
sharing this humility
a circle of humanity
momentarily black in me
immomentarily black
so black

memory leave me be
close that eye leave love blind

when outcome is preceded
by an outlet that is needed
we forget all but the circle
as soon as the ends have met
as soon as the ends have met

i scratch the surface and see
someone better than me
where did i suffer that loss?
what was taken from me?

as i search through the ashes
for someone to blame
i’m afraid to see my face
as i walk through the ashes
i whisper your name
meeting you have forced me
to meet myself

this blood proves me right
in that the last move is all that
counts if the beasts must bite
vow to the floor
oath to the taste of dust
in my mouth - never!
i bite the words - never again!
will i let anyone else finish
i’ll be the end of every way

memory let it die left behind
leave me blind

despite all these words
not one could express
what i had inside
living was to hide

kneeling in whirlpools
of pink champagne
celebrating the bravery of my pain
something broke
and no water could ever wash
the anger from that first stain

i scratched the surface to find
someone wicked and blind
where did it come to that end?
why can’t these scars ever mend?

memories...

i have swallowed all these tears
thought they’d be gone
after all these years
now this heart is waking up
with a new hunger
for my own blood

as i search through the ashes
for someone to blame
i’m afraid to see my face
as i walk through the ashes
i whisper your name
meeting you have forced me
to meet myself

face to the ground
heart in their mouth foreheads hit the pavement
again - numb - again
sharing my hostility
a streetful of insanity
this is payback for every
tear in me, hole in me
black in me - black!

memory history agony
let me see that hideous
idioglossia that formed me

despite all these words
not one could express
what i had inside
living was to hide

for every time you froze me out
for every punch every shout
for not believing in me
for your stupidity
for stealing what could have been
mine

it all comes back to you


is this all i am?

her voices

akasha
the perfect element inin 6. şarkısı

looking at you
i see her face
through all these years, just waiting
it all catches up to you when you slow down

i’m back in that yard
tasting that shame
of pushing her down, of kids and her games
their strongholds

we had a bigger world
we had a better view
i guess i never fully realized then
what she lost
when i cut that loss

so she filled the void
with unearthly friends
voices of hers - greater... than us

we had a bigger world - we had a better view
i wish she’d never told us about her voices
we were strong, we were much too strong

never forgive - never forget

we picked and pierced
we ripped and we tore
we hit and we scratched to make in her a hole
glares and eyes
whispers and notes
attached to her every pose

we fed her shouts
for the collection of her voices
i was too weak to collect
but so, it turned out, was she
both paid in soul for the cutting of that loss

their ugly truth
outnumbered by far her beautiful dreams
and i closed my eyes
were her eyes in yours already when we met?
am i still paying debts to recover life?

now i can see she proved to be right
as she was called down
it’s sad though
that i turned out to be one of her voices..

(albümün dönüm noktası: babanın pişmanlığı başlar.)

morning on earth

akasha
pain of salvationın the perfect element i albümünün 4. şarkısı.

for as long as i can remember i have wanted to
silence every beating heart; every sound of breathing
now there is something inside of me that aches as i hear you
breathing here when you sleep between these morning sheets

i am the tears in your mouth
i am the weight on your shoulder
i am the scream that wants out
and my heart just couldn’t grow colder
now this rusty heart is my gift
this fallen love is my gift

morning arrives on an earth i’ve never seen before
revealing a life that i never really understood
strange, the way beauty can hurt the unopened eye
much more than all of the filth and pain
that we’re soaked in ever could

i am the tears in your mouth
i am the weight on your shoulder
i am the scream that wants out
and my heart just couldn’t grow colder

hear this voice, see this man standing before you
i’m just a child trapped inside the body of a man

a relation, so oddly old - bred not to love
suffers the beaten grounds of idioglossia
we talk but we do not speak
together only in our incapability to leave this fallen playground
we rule this empire merely with these few crippled toys
rust in our faces
this is what we can share - this is all we can lose
still
furiously we will linger to it with our lives
cling to its rust and pains
barefoot and torn
bred not but born to love

hear this voice, see this man standing before you
i’m just a child trapped inside this fallen man
see this child

in the flesh

akasha
pain of salvationın da aynı isimli bir parçası vardır.

she walks these empty streets alone
looking for something they call "home"
hoping to find some peace of mind
sometimes we need to walk alone

she is set on running away
though her mom was yelling she must stay
a wind beaten bird for reasons unheard
sometimes it is best to run away

so fly away, fly away, fly away
don’t be afraid, don’t hesitate, fly away

some wear their bruises on their skin
others hide their scars deep within
she has a wound close to her womb
blames herself for letting it in

so fly away, fly away, fly away
don’t be afraid, don’t hesitate, fly away
but she’s afraid, she’s afraid, she’s afraid
anyway
see those eyes, see those eyes, see those eyes
hate and lies, a fire that slowly dies
but she will fly, she will fly, she will fly
before it dies

sometimes the hands that feed
must feed a mind with a sick need
and the hands that clutch can be
the same hands that touch too much
eyes that hungrily stare
read in an access that’s not there
while eyes close to hide tears
or look away in fear
run away!

passing the open stores
hiding her dirty sores
seeking asylum among freaks and whores
what wouldn’t she give to be in a society
not learning the eyes to be closed but to see

now she bites the words
"never"
she kicks the ground
"never"
swallows her tears
"never will i go back"
she hits the walls
"leave me!"
scratches herself
"leave me!"
begs to all gods
"rip me from this sick flesh!"

"i will always be there"
"no!"
she holds her ears
"you know that i love you"
pretends that she doesn’t hear
"we’re in this together"
"we share the same skin"
panic in his voice now
"free us from sin"

"tell me that you love me"
this is the end
"i know that you do"
of her way
never ever again
follow me down

"god forgive this hunger"
"please mommy see"
"never tell a soul"
"is it me?"
a child will love its parents
will follow them down

she swears to the pavement’s heart of stone
that these city lights will be her home
but still as they burn she will return
back to the adults. . . of her home.

albümün en vurucu şarkısıdır idioglossia ile beraber de belli etmez.

used

akasha
(bkz: the perfect element i) in 1. parçası.albümün ana teması çöt diye ortaya konmaktadır esasen, ama tabi her yöne çekilebilir sözleri:

"i am the unclean
the black drop at the bottom of your cup
you’d better drink or throw me up
’cause i am on your lip and tongue
god
i’m not yours as much as you are mine
so let me in to be your lung
just breathe me deep and take another sip
so still
a taste so sweet but so bitter the kill
still on your lip
you are so close
i’ll let you come
between my legs you are closer death than sun
and i’m not your daughter as much as you’re my son
i’ll let you come
in my mouth on your lip
so ready and thirsty for the next sip
you let me in, i let you come
i’d never let you down
you let me win, i let you drown!"

getting used to pain getting used to pain getting..

i am crying unwept tears through this violence
i’ll die trying to break this thick crust of silence

"i am the greatest star
so bright that you all come forth and beg to taste my light
i can take you far but i’ll burn you out before we get there
but hey! who am i to stand in your way?
go ahead; swallow me down!
i’ll have no problems finding myself out
when you’ve gone down
when your all cracked and wound."

getting used to pain

i am crying unwept tears through this violence
i’ll die trying to break this thick crust of silence

trading pain is a bad deal
i’ve got more than my share
too much to bear!
every beat of the hammer
every blood stricken street:
a way to trade off heat.

they will bleed till i’m empty
if i deserve to die i’ll make it show
i will stain your affection, i will wear out your heart
you’ll follow where i go.

blood stains
cut veins
filthy
murder
leave me..

the perfect element i

akasha
pain of salvation adlı progressive grubun çıkardığı 3. albüm. en başarılı konsept albümlerinden, tabii ki 2003 çıkışlı be’yi saymazsak. 2000’de piyasaya sürülen the perfect element part i nin part ii sinden hala ses yok. part inin tracklisti de şöyle:

1. used
2. in the flesh
3. ashes
4. morning on earth
5. idioglossia
6. her voices
7. dedication
8. king of loss
9. reconciliation
10.song for the innocent
11.falling
12.the perfect element


ingiliz cayi

akasha
sütle içmek şart değildir, twingings’ın çeşitlerinden birisidir "english breakfast tea"; "earl grey", "old english tea" gibi. ingilizler genelde sütle güzelim kan kırmızısı çayı yıvışık bir kahverengiye dönüştürüp içerler, o ayrı.

konuyla alakasız ama illaki serbest çağrışım: (bkz: boston tea party)

plagiarism

akasha
kişi, kurum veya kuruluşun kaynak vermeden veya kaynağı kendisiymiş gibi göstererek başka kişi, kurum veya kuruluşların eser, metin veya sözlerine atıfta bulunması. ciddi legal yaptırımı olabilir veya "olm o lafı x dememiş miydi?" diye geçiştirilebilir. her halikarda emeğe saygısızlıktır. ve türkçesi aklıma gelmemektedir.

intihalmiş.. (kaynak: robert kolej el kitabı)

akasha

akasha
maharet ve mekare kabilelerinin geleneksel ritüelini gerçekleştirecekken akasha ve enkil’in askerleri tarafından yakalanır. kabilenin şifacısı (ve şefi, büyücüsü) olan annelerinin kalbini ve beynini yiyerek onun yerine geçeceklerken kral ve kraliçenin huzuruna çıkarılırlar.

ikizler mısır’da, mö4000 lerde uğursuzluğun habercisidir. yamyamlığın cezası olarak akasha kızlara hizmetkarları khayman’ın tecavüz etmesini emreder. mekare bunun üzerine kötü güçlerden (güç, ruh, vb.) amel’i çiftin üzerine salar. amel epey bir karambol yaratıp akasha’yı yaralar, sonra da kanına karışır. aniden kana dayanılmaz bir açlık duyan akasha, kocası enkil’i içerek önce öldürür, sonra ona kendi kanını içirerek ruhun bir parçasını ona verir.

açlık hala dayanılmazdır. kral ve kraliçe önceleri geceleri gizlice "avlanmaya" çıksalar da, zamanla halkları şüphelenir, ve kaçmaya mecbur kalırlar. amel’in ruhunu yeni soylara paylaştırdıkça beslenme güdüsü zayıflar.

yüzyıllar sonra akasha, lestat de lioncourtya aşık olur ve enkil’i öldürür.
dünya barışıyla da ilgilenen kızımız, tüm barbarlıkların erkeklerin başının altından çıktığı iddiasıyla bir ara avrupanın yarısındaki erkekleri de yok etmiştir.

son zamanlarda 4. nesil bilgiç olarak yaşamını sürdürmektedir.

hoşbulduk efendim, saygılarımla...

dark tranquillity

akasha
13.albümleri fiction 25 nisan 2007 de resmen çıkmıştır. bu insan üstü yaratıklar sadece müzikleriyle değil bilimum albüm ve web sitesi tasarımlarıyla da biz sefil homo sapiens sapienslerden farklarını belli etmektedirler. damage done ve the minds i yı yapan zaten insan olamaz.

sanitarium

akasha
oynadığım ilk adventure oyunudur, dolayısıyla bitirince piyasadaki tüm türdeşlerini toplama arzusu yaratmıştır. tabii ki bu diğer oyunlar sanitariumun yanına bile yaklaşamamıştır.

sol framede görünce yıllar öncesine götüren başlıktır bir de.
18 /

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